For example, a passive-aggressive person might appear to agree — perhaps even enthusiastically — with another person's request.Rather than complying with the request, however, he or she might express anger or resentment by failing to follow through or missing deadlines.Not only that, you step into the role of parent – the very one your partner is rebelling against. It’s far better to address noncompliance and problems in the relationship directly.Don’t be vague, drop hints, blame, or allow yourself to pay back in kind. Frame it in terms of “We have a problem,” not “You are the problem,” which is shaming.They’re basically obstructionists who try to block whatever it is you want.Their unconscious anger gets transferred onto you, and you become frustrated and furious.Because you can’t have an honest, direct conversation with a passive-aggressive partner, nothing ever gets resolved. They try to sabotage your wants, needs, and plans using a variety of tactics.
Often the behavior is one expression of the patient’s resentment at failing to find gratification in a relationship with an individual or institution upon which he is over-dependent. 44, code 301.81)The DSM-IV ascribed the disorder to someone with negative attitudes and passive resistance to requests for adequate performance, indicated by at least 4 of these traits not due to depression:• Passively resists fulfilling routine tasks• Complains of being misunderstood and unappreciated• Is sullen and argumentative• Scorns and criticizes authority• Expresses envy and resentment toward those seeming more fortunate• Frequently makes exaggerated complaints of misfortune• Shows alternating hostile defiance and contrition After nearly 40 years it was dropped in 1994. Passive-aggression was found to be related to borderline and narcissistic personality disorders, negative childhood experiences, and substance abuse.
Passive-aggressive behavior is a pattern of indirectly expressing negative feelings instead of openly addressing them.
There's a disconnect between what a passive-aggressive person says and what he or she does.
Rather than say no or address their anger, they forget your birthday or the plans you’ve discussed, or forget to put gas in the car, pickup your prescription, or fix the leaky toilet. They’re avoidant and don’t like schedules or deadlines.
It’s another form of rebellion, so they delay and delay with endless excuses.
Passive-aggressive people act passive, but express aggression covertly.